DCXIII: The Other Side

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: the door on the other side looks really small
Lani Kai: well, it's only about 8 inches high
ibleedgraphite: for the leprechauns that work at Kaiser Permanente?

DCXII: Manipulation

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: the clouds near the horizon seem like they have linear burn applied
Lani Kai: I wouldn't know
ibleedgraphite: linear burn decrease brightness to darken the base color and reflect the blend color
Lani Kai: if you say so
Lani Kai: I've probably never used it before
ibleedgraphite: it looks like the clouds started a little lighter
ibleedgraphite: and were blended with the orange via linear burn
Lani Kai: I don't use blending options
ibleedgraphite: blending modes are the best
ibleedgraphite: do you at least use multiply?
Lani Kai: no
ibleedgraphite: if I have a Photoshop file with more than 10 layers
ibleedgraphite: chances are at least one is set to multiply
Lani Kai: I don't ever have more than 10 layers
Lani Kai: on extremely rare occasions
Lani Kai: I might have as many as two layers
ibleedgraphite: including adjustment layers?
Lani Kai: I don't really use that either
Lani Kai: god, how much photo manipulation are you doing?

DCXI: Strategy

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: what does the phrase "strategic partnership" mean?
Lani Kai: that they will strategically take advantage of you and run away with all the money?
ibleedgraphite: well, how is that different from a regular partnership
Lani Kai: a regular partnership is not necessarily strategic
Lani Kai: maybe he will punch you and take your money and run
ibleedgraphite: I have strategically not stepped outside today

DCX: Malfunction

© Colorburn

Lani Kai: https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYZTRoEcX1sgJ1uSUpvxqdgTmqfhkVhf6ltHzUrSLKnwxCk6MvKoI941uYba5-pJ-Wi6NjgAnMipfiZeKBlIMYqOWEC6YTebFG0djz8tOy5cyu7V6ws5M3FgAG-GjrmT3HbzoHMQ/s1600-h/OM180399.jpg 
ibleedgraphite: what?
Lani Kai: what
ibleedgraphite: it said you said something
Lani Kai: https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYZTRoEcX1sgJ1uSUpvxqdgTmqfhkVhf6ltHzUrSLKnwxCk6MvKoI941uYba5-pJ-Wi6NjgAnMipfiZeKBlIMYqOWEC6YTebFG0djz8tOy5cyu7V6ws5M3FgAG-GjrmT3HbzoHMQ/s1600-h/OM180399.jpg
iibleedgraphite: you did it again
Lani Kai: what the hell are you talking about
ibleedgraphite: it keeps showing your screen name as if you typed a message
ibleedgraphite: but there is no message

DCIX: Reddy or Not

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: this is red
Lani Kai: that is red

DCVIII: Tied Down

© Colorburn

Lani Kai: so you know how "SOS" is ***---***
Lani Kai: "3TIE" is ***---***
Lani Kai: how do you differentiate?
ibleedgraphite: I don't think you need to
ibleedgraphite: wearing 3 ties is clearly a fashion emergency requiring immediate relief

DCVII: Niche Market

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: nurf
Lani Kai: nerf?
ibleedgraphite: no, that's trademarked
Lani Kai: are you allowed to have homophonic product names?
Lani Kai: like an App-Oh Eyepod?
ibleedgraphite: great, mp3 player for autistic Koreans

DCVI: Distractions

© Colorburn
View Uncropped

ibleedgraphite: the orange bit is pretty cool
ibleedgraphite: perhaps you should focus on that
Lani Kai: and crop the background out?
ibleedgraphite: or something

...

ibleedgraphite: hm, the background is still distracting to me
Lani Kai: don't be so easily distracted then
ibleedgraphite: okay
ibleedgraphite: I will cut a hole in a sheet of white paper the shape of the wooden thing
ibleedgraphite: and place it over the monitor when I need to look at your picture

DCV: Annoying

© Colorburn

Lani Kai: this is the kind of photo your mother would like, if not for the missing petals
ibleedgraphite: I like it for the annoyingly saturated colors

DCIV: Trickery

© Colorburn

Lani Kai: that is rather Ansel Adams-y
Lani Kai: I like the light
ibleedgraphite: it is artificial
ibleedgraphite: there's actually very little contrast
ibleedgraphite: changing the levels that much messed up the color, which is hidden by the bw
ibleedgraphite: I've probably never taken a correctly exposed photo in my life that turned out well

DCIII: Freedom of Thought

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: that is an evil sign
ibleedgraphite: it just made me think of parking there
Lani Kai: it is
Lani Kai: are you supposed to stop or not?
ibleedgraphite: oh
ibleedgraphite: I was only looking at the bottom one
ibleedgraphite: you seem to enjoy taking pictures of signs on the sides of roads
Lani Kai: perhaps

DCII: In Popular Culture

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: hmm
ibleedgraphite: I believe that building was designed by Renzo Piano
ibleedgraphite: and it was blown up by aliens in Independence Day
ibleedgraphite: aliens don't like postmodern architecture
Lani Kai: "The building was designed by Henry N. Cobb of the architectural firm Pei Cobb Freed & Partners and cost $350 million to build."
ibleedgraphite: oh, okay
ibleedgraphite: that makes more sense
Lani Kai: the Wikipedia article also doesn't say anything about Independence Day
Lani Kai: which means it didn't happen
ibleedgraphite: I'll add it then
ibleedgraphite: the page needs an "In Popular Culture" section
Lani Kai: I'll flag it with [citation needed]

DCI: Premium Photography

© Colorburn 

Lani Kai: nulla facilisi vivamus blandit

ibleedgraphite: I presume the word above is BEST
Lani Kai: yes
Lani Kai: what is the word under it?
ibleedgraphite: hmm
ibleedgraphite: SUV?
Lani Kai: no
ibleedgraphite: darn
Lani Kai: it's a clothing store
ibleedgraphite: CLOTHES
Lani Kai: no, it was jeans
Lani Kai: now guess the clothing store chain
ibleedgraphite: um
ibleedgraphite: American Apparel
Lani Kai: nope
ibleedgraphite: Target
Lani Kai: haha no
ibleedgraphite: I believe I need a clue
Lani Kai: 3 brands owned by this chain
ibleedgraphite: Gap?
Lani Kai: yep
ibleedgraphite: false advertising

DC: Trippy

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: trippy
Lani Kai: actually "trippy" would be more relevant if this were at Death Valley 
Lani Kai: "The philosopher Michel Foucault called his 1975 acid trip at Zabriskie Point the greatest experience of his life."
Lani Kai: but it ties in with the next line in that article
Lani Kai: This location is featured prominently on the cover of U2's album The Joshua Tree.
ibleedgraphite: was that before or after the pendulum?
Lani Kai: what pendulum?
ibleedgraphite: Foucault's pendulum?
Lani Kai: or did you mean panopticon
ibleedgraphite: pretty sure it was a pendulum
Lani Kai: [citation needed]
ibleedgraphite: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foucault_pendulum
ibleedgraphite: and dont accuse me of writing this whole article just now
Lani Kai: wrong Foucault
Lani Kai: nice going

DCXCIX: Nonsense

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: how fast does it go? 
Lani Kai: umm
Lani Kai: probably just under 200mph
ibleedgraphite: i meant the shutter speed
Lani Kai: that makes no sense at all
ibleedgraphite: shut up

DXCVIII: Bzz

© Colorburn

Lani Kai: is it turned toward you?
ibleedgraphite: yes, it is ready for its close-up
Lani Kai: why the black and white?
Lani Kai: and it's like a mild black and white by your standards
ibleedgraphite: moving the levels enough to bring out the highlights in the bee
ibleedgraphite: blew out the background on the right, which is like exactly the same shade of gray
ibleedgraphite: and I was too lazy to make the adjustments manually

DXCVII: Slight Coincidence

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: hey, that's pretty

Lani Kai: it's the same place as this photo

Lani Kai: I realized that after I pulled over in the dark

ibleedgraphite: what a strange coincidence

Lani Kai: only slightly, because I wanted to get some Joshua tree silhouettes

Lani Kai: and there aren't very many places in Joshua Tree National Park where you can get lots of Joshua trees in the shot

Lani Kai: this area probably has the densest group that is visible, from the road anyway

DXCVI: Sporty

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: what does the sport button do?
Lani Kai: it makes things sporty
Lani Kai: i.e. firmer suspension, less intrusive stability control, faster gear change, etc
ibleedgraphite: oh, like sporty spice

DXCV: New and Improved

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: cheater
ibleedgraphite: I posted this like 3 years ago
ibleedgraphite: thought I wouldn't notice?
Lani Kai: mine is better
ibleedgraphite: that's because you already saw mine
Lani Kai: Colorburn is always striving for improvement
ibleedgraphite: mine is original
Lani Kai: yours is unpolished
Lani Kai: it's the beta release
ibleedgraphite: well mine already has all the market share
ibleedgraphite: so nyeh
Lani Kai: yours has a manufacturing defect and needs to be recalled
ibleedgraphite: people already love mine, they don't want to be bothered with new and so-called improved stuff which is merely repackaged and more expensive and harder to use
Lani Kai: you engage in unethical practices
Lani Kai: my waterdrops were unharmed in the making of this photograph

Lani Kai: I don't think the same can be said about yours

DXCIV: Running Away

© Colorburn

ibleedgraphite: how long does it take a normal person to run a mile?
Lani Kai: normal as in the average overweight American?
Lani Kai: or someone like you and me
ibleedgraphite: the kind of person who would know how long it takes them to run a mile

Lani Kai: 7-8 minutes, maybe
ibleedgraphite: all the people on Yahoo! Answers
ibleedgraphite: are apparently very nimble
ibleedgraphite: according to Yahoo!
ibleedgraphite: "It seems to me that a 15-year-old male should be running about a 5:30 to 6:00 mile."

ibleedgraphite: maybe if something was chasing them