Tuesday, September 29, 2009

DLXX: A Tribute to an Artist

Lani Kai: this photo is a tribute
Lani Kai: because that seems to be the cool thing to do these days
ibleedgraphite: who's the silly person who put the Priority Mail sticker there?
ibleedgraphite: the postage to mail the stoplight would be like $1,234,355
Lani Kai: try a flat rate box
Lani Kai: anyway, this is fitting
Lani Kai: Jackson worked on an analog medium
R.I.P. Jackson Pollock
January 28, 1912 – August 11, 1956

Sunday, September 27, 2009

DLXIX: No It Doesn't

© Colorburn
ibleedgraphite: why is that one stem bent over?
Lani Kai: hm, I never noticed
Lani Kai: now it's going to bother me
Lani Kai: thanks a lot
ibleedgraphite: it looks like it's performing oral sex on the other stem
Lani Kai: no it doesn't
ibleedgraphite: fine
ibleedgraphite: I was just trying to bother you more

DLXVIII: Power Lines -Reprise-

© Colorburn
ibleedgraphite: wow, it's very vertical
ibleedgraphite: the pole is perfectly parallel with the edges of the frame
Lani Kai: that's the proper way to do it
Lani Kai: have all yours been horizontal?
ibleedgraphite: yes, yes, yes, and no

DLXVII: Complexity

© Colorburn
ibleedgraphite: have you ever bled on your Monopoly set?
Lani Kai: no
ibleedgraphite: the proper way to play is to cut off a finger whenever your opponent lands on free parking
ibleedgraphite: anyway, Mr. Moneybags represents the military-industrial complex; notice his hands are bloody

Monday, September 21, 2009

DLXVI: Not a Chance

Lani Kai: was the chance square a landmine?
ibleedgraphite: they don't have landmines in Iraq, just IEDs
ibleedgraphite: in any case, he's definitely not passing Go
Lani Kai: $200 these days is not worth it anyway

Sunday, September 20, 2009

DLXV: Maternal Instincts

© Colorburn
ibleedgraphite: this is the second photo in my series examining the Iraq War using Monopoly and plastic soldiers; it represents the prisoner abuse scandal at Abu Ghraib
Lani Kai: that is large
ibleedgraphite: that's what your mom said
Lani Kai: the original image was 3504x1752
ibleedgraphite: that's creepy, how did you know that?
Lani Kai: your mom told me

Saturday, September 19, 2009

DLXIV: Faulty Intelligence

© Colorburn
ibleedgraphite: did you hear about [Trypto]?
Lani Kai: no, what happened?
ibleedgraphite: what?? you don't know?! why did you think he wasn't online or answering the phone or anything?
Lani Kai: look, if I knew, I would have said, "yes, I've heard"
ibleedgraphite: his appendix burst, they rushed him to the hospital a couple days ago
ibleedgraphite: it's really bad; there were complications
Lani Kai: what kind of complications?
ibleedgraphite: apparently his pyloric sphincter is a portal to Narnia
ibleedgraphite: JUST KIDDING EVERYONE! I just changed my screen name; I actually stopped using Trypto like two years ago
Lani Kai: I think it's facing the wrong direction
ibleedgraphite: exactly, it represents the rushed decision to invade Iraq after 9/11 based on faulty intelligence and with poorly defined goals
ibleedgraphite: the darkness embodies the murky and morally ambivalent nature of the conflict

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

DLXIII: Google, the Bringer of Odd Visitors

© Lani Kai
Lani Kai: I noticed some Google hits from a while back so I added those
Lani Kai: colorburn pattern
Lani Kai: can you get tan under Lanai?
ibleedgraphite: heh
Lani Kai: photoblogs aboy nude boating
Lani Kai: Rodney Lough Jr blogs
Lani Kai: white as milk photoblog

DLXII: Un Chat

© Lani Kai
ibleedgraphite: was this taken from the perspective of a cat deciding whether or not to eat the flowers?
Lani Kai: no, a cat took that picture with my camera
ibleedgraphite: Henri Cattier-Burmese?

DLXI: Misdirection

© ibleedgraphite
Lani Kai: straight-ahead arrow lights really never made much sense to me
ibleedgraphite: what if there was a red arrow that pointed downwards?
Lani Kai: that typically means it's not ok to drive in that lane,
such as a toll booth that is closed
ibleedgraphite: it doesn't mean you're going to hell?

Sunday, September 13, 2009

DLX: Uuuu

© ibleedgraphite
ibleedgraphite: typing (U) makes a broken heart emoticon in Digsby
Lani Kai: how is a broken heart U?
ibleedgraphite: because u broke my heart
Lani Kai: u for unrequited?
ibleedgraphite: u for ugly...

DLIX: Hardware Semantics

© ibleedgraphite
Lani Kai: I think you should make it black and white
ibleedgraphite: okay
ibleedgraphite: what's the difference between screw, bolt, and nuts?
Lani Kai: a nut is typically hexagonal, and has threads on the inside. Screws and bolts are similar--they have threads on the outside, but bolts don't necessarily have a screw head
ibleedgraphite: no
Lani Kai: what do you mean, "no"
ibleedgraphite: nuts are what you use to screw, and then bolt is what you do after you finish screwing

DLVIII: It's Not Necrophilia If The Prophecy Made You Do It

© ibleedgraphite
Lani Kai: if tomorrow is the best day of my life, I might as well shoot myself after tomorrow
ibleedgraphite: if you shoot yourself tomorrow, you won't be kissed by the love of your life on Friday
Lani Kai: people kiss dead people at the viewing

Friday, September 11, 2009

DLVII: Existentialism

© Lani Kai
Lani Kai: if you take out your lines on Colorburn
Lani Kai: it is largely incoherent
Lani Kai: but if you take out all of mine it is eerily similar to Garfield Minus Garfield
ibleedgraphite: the existential rambling of a psychotic photographer?

DLVI: Un-American

© ibleedgraphite
Lani Kai: this is the American dream?
Trypto: actually it's a really old anti-drug sticker from 1st grade
Trypto: that I attached to a random object in the house

Thursday, September 10, 2009

DLV: Vaguely So

© Lani Kai

Lani Kai: it's already been two months since Utah?
ibleedgraphite: that's it?
ibleedgraphite: it feels like a pretty long time ago to me
ibleedgraphite: oooh
ibleedgraphite: the background is vaguely ominous

Monday, September 07, 2009

DLIV: Imitation

© Lani Kai
ibleedgraphite: I don't need supreme quality
ibleedgraphite: I need good-enough quality
Lani Kai: clearly, you are not ambitious enough
ibleedgraphite: is there a word for "satisfaction and excitement from good-enough quality"?
Lani Kai: off-brand